Questions for Couples for Better Understanding, Communication, and Connection

Questions I like to ask couples to explore together in session

1. What are three things I do that make you feel loved? This question encourages recognition of positive behavior, reinforcing what’s working in the relationship.

2. How can I better support you when you’re feeling upset or stressed? This promotes empathy and understanding, helping both partners navigate conflicts with more compassion.

3. What does a fulfilling relationship look like to you? Understanding each other’s vision can guide the journey toward a satisfying relationship.

Couples therapy exercises for home

Once couples start learning how to ask better couples therapy questions, they can start practicing asking each other these types of questions at home. Here are some couples therapy exercise questions to provide as homework for clients.

1. What are some of our happiest memories together? Reflecting on happy memories can reignite the warmth and affection in your relationship.

   
   
   
   

2. How have we grown as a couple? This question can offer a perspective on your progress, inspiring further growth.

3. In what areas do you think we can improve? Honest conversation about areas of improvement can lead to constructive actions.

4. What is something special or exciting you’d like to do together? This could be an opening for your partner to discuss things they don’t usually talk about.

5. What can I help you with right now? This could be helpful to show you’re being present and supportive with your partner.

It’s great to get into the practice of having these types of conversations at home. 

Couples might consider setting aside time every week to ask each other questions, listen to each other, and say how they feel like things are going. It’s easy to let these things slide after being with someone for a long time, but it’s well worth taking the time to check in.